I know what you mean about the quiet. Sometimes I walk the dog without seeing another human. It's disconcerting.

And even though Utah is Utah and pretty much not representative of anywhere else, quiet can be part of the appeal of suburban living.

On the one hand, we've noted many times in many countries that cities in the US seem filled with teens and young adults but not particularly family or senior-friendly.

If that was addressed, or an effort was made to design cities to attract and retain those demos, it would change the desirability of city life and the health and well-being of the communities too.

One thing we love about traveling abroad is discovering cities filled with multi-generational families and communities. It makes them so much more vibrant and welcoming. And the people seem so much happier and engaged too.

But, like everything, there's no correct answer. Everything has an upside and a downside and right timing.

BK (Before Kids)
I lived in the city. I loved wandering out, bumping into anyone anywhere, and finding everything you could think of to do, eat, or enjoy.

But I disliked renting, parking was horrendous, and safety was occasionally an issue.

When I bought a condo in the suburbs, mainly to shorten the commute to the airport and kickstart home ownership, I was surprised to learn that I could still afford to love the city because I wasn't paying a fortune in rent.

I could even travel to other cities I wanted to enjoy.

Did I miss walking outdoors and being in the center of the action? Yes, no, kind of, maybe, sometimes.

I was on the go, but in a different way. I ventured further than my city. (And I didn't miss the grime or crime I had gotten used to.)

AK (After Kids)
A few obvious things matter when contemplating where to raise kids - childcare, healthcare, schools, and parking, for example.

And there are surprising criteria too - stroller-friendliness, fenced yard, parks, playgrounds, access to anything from baby supplies to pediatricians to groceries stores within five miles, and other families out and about. And parking, even more than we imagined.

Being outdoors mattered more to us than restaurants or galleries nearby, and having a large, relatively affordable home was and is the foundation for happiness for our family.

For many people, including us, a house in the suburbs, and WFH jobs, mean saving money and time.

We can visit grandparents, Disneyland, and even travel internationally with what we save by not living and working in the city.

I'm not saying suburbs are the answer for everyone, but you'd be surprised how many places in suburbia aren't what you describe.

There are cute communities with vibrant social scenes and diverse gathering places.

Yes, they can be sleepy after dark, but for parents, that's not a bad thing, and there's less of a "we're in it together" feeling that I miss, but for this stage, we love it.